First off, two hours of this show is just too much. I mean I get that there is enough content for two hours and that the show is one of ABC's big hits (go watch Revenge) but man how long can one watch a bunch of drunk ladies throw themselves at a guy in desperate hopes to get a rose? But I digress, that's what the show is all about, it's about trash and train wrecks. About drama and heartbreak, about excitement... Wait. Excitement? They do know that they picked Ben as the Bachelor right? I compared this guy to a robot last season with Ashley. Although Ben did score a lot of points with me when he actually got pissed off about getting dumped the way he did with her. And last season's farewell on a boat was a classic.
So let's look at Ben, the man behind the hair. Ben is our mild mannered man from Northern California, a wine maker by trade and a big ball of energy. If ever there was a person that needed to get drunk it is Ben, just to liven him up a little bit. But maybe I'm being a little too critical of our star for the season, I mean he did crack a couple dry jokes as the ladies paraded themselves before him. One of them even going so far as to wear their actual sash, which makes me think, shouldn't they all just have a sash on? Miss Sweet Tennessee, Miss Bubbly Texas, Miss I rode a horse, Miss I brought an old lady, Miss I wore a big hat, Miss the rapping disease lady, Miss I'm British and think I'm funny, Miss I'm a model, Miss I'm a crazy blogger that over analyses thi... Ok maybe I should stop.
(looks at self in mirror and hangs head in shame)
Jen made the best comment to me whilst we were watching, "They aren't picking women for him, they are casting for roles." (or something like that) It's true, the selection of ladies isn't about Ben it's about finding women to fit a given need on the show so that Disney can appeal to a broad demographic, in hopes that America will identify with one of more of them. The problem of course is that you get a house full of crazy women that are more interested in winning Ben than finding a relationship with him. Oh wait... I forgot, it's working in the ratings.
(Shakes fist at the TV)
"Damn you Disney making us watch what you tell us we should enjoy, damn you! And Damn your piece of crap BCS championship game, anyone North of the Mason-Dixon line doesn't want to watch a rematch of a crappy football game!"
Wait, where was I??? Sorry I blacked out for a minute. I think I'm still recovering from New Year's.
Anyway before I ramble myself into oblivion, let's hope that Ben is at least interesting, with how low Ashley set the bar last year it shouldn't be much for him to exceed that at least. And I'm a romantic at heart, maybe he'll find that right women who isn't looking for a career in entertainment. So before I watch the first rose ceremony, I toast to Ben and the hope that he'll find love, and that we'll find disastrous drama that is entertaining for me to make fun of.
And before I have my man card revoked for watching the Bachelor over the very good bowl games that were going on.
Oregon looked great but should be thankful that there weren't 3 seconds left on that clock, it would have been fitting for Wisconsin to have won on a Hail Mary.
And as for Oklahoma State, they can say that they played the same caliber team as either LSU or Alabama, which is a team that is unable to kick a field goal.
Come back tomorrow for part 2 and a recap of the Hokies performance in the Sugar Bowl.
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